H still pushing for me to keep the house. I think more to appease his guilty conscience. There are days when he's a Chatty Cathy and then the next he's glacial. I can't ever predict the person he's going to be on any given day.
There is a reason he wants to keep the house and you need to find it. Would you be able to afford it without anything from him. That's first and foremost. I never could predict the craziness from my ex, either.
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I had my first A appointment. That was really difficult. It's so difficult to actually look someone in the eye and tell them my H wants a D. I failed. I realize that's wrong, but it is how I feel. It was sad to hear my almost 20 year marriage broken down to dollar figures. He said, it's all numbers now. Maybe to him, but it's so much more than that to my family.
The initial lawyer appointment is second toughest (the toughest is when things are finalized. How on earth did you fail? Ridiculous statement is ridiculous. You didn't - HE DID. Period.
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I find myself still overly emotional about it today. I'm losing half my family. I'm losing what could have - should have been. Dreams. Plans. A future. I was doing well.... today not so much
Yeah, I'd like to say it gets easier. It does, just not in the timeline we want. And for some, it never does.
There are moments in this life when you are so confident in the rightness of your actions, that not even for a second do you consider the option that you might be wrong.
