I know I'm not supposed to initiate R talks but what do you do when your S is obviously angry about something and doesn't say anything (my W stuffs her feelings). Do you ignore it or ask what is bothering you?

Gordie 40s W 40s M20+ kids
2016 BD W fantasy affair w OM1 I do everything wrong
2017 I start to DB W says TLTL files for D PA w OM2
2018 I do LRT W drops filing and OM2 situation slowly improving