Jeep, Man you're so right. While my daughters at school I struggle, but as soon as she gets in the car my face lights up. So I broke down again and asked her to please tell me if there is someone else: I was calm and told her I really needed to know. My S is having shoulder surgery tmrw morning to repair a broken collarbone and she's off traveling for work. She should be here for this, and I know that if she weren't in this fog, she would be. My kids know what's going on because they asked me. I told them the truth, that moms not herself right, that she's confused and needs time and space from me to figure things out. Anyway, I asked her straightforwardly if there were someone else. This was her response verbatim. "There is no one else, I know what I want one day but it's not now. Right now it's about exploring things in my life I never had the chance to do. I've always had limits in my life while working my soul out and never really asking for anything. I lost my spirit with you because I waited so long for you to give me what was only just a thought in your head and to me "the thought that counts" just isn't enough anymore. I still have love for you and believe with all my heart that you are The Greatest Dad. That is the best thing I can give my children. Are things going to be different? Yes. Do you need to leave? No." Ive told her in the past that I couldn't stay if there were someone else. It seems like I want an answer from her at the time but then when she gives me the answer I want I can't trust it. Geez.. but I guess I have to continue on like she's telling me the truth if I want to make this work out I n the end. I felt I needed to know the truth, as well, to know how to proceed in my db'ing. Ias I've seen in the past she responds to me being cheery, letting her have space and being responsive when she wants to talk. I think I'm going to take Sandi's advice for LBS's whose W's aren't having an A. It seems she wants her independence more than anything else. In my head I've also stated to plan out how I could move back home and start a new life there. My kids both want to be with me if it comes down to that. But for now I'm gonna continue working out, working, spending time with my kids, concentrating on me and letting her have her space. She bought some Hockey tickets for this Friday night for the whole family. Should I go? I think she really wants family time. I know she's feeling guilty she's not here for the surgery. My son is not happy with her right now and she knows it. Thanks Jeep for your response. I go on and on.. it feels good to let it out here. AK8
