I realise that I am a free agent now and I live my life, however uneventful, the way I want. I have thrown myself into my career and spend my free time with either friends or the children. I enjoy my own company and like to relax when I am home.

I am concerned though that any dating would close the door on my ex W. I think she might pull away and give up on the idea if she wasn't my first choice. The other problem has been her relying on me to have the kids and help her out which I am happy to do. As I mentioned before, she has been suggesting we go out together which is not dating as such but a start. Any third party involved would put a stop to that too.

It's a difficult situation to navigate as I cannot stop contact with her because of the kids and we enjoy our chats. There may be nothing else discussed at the moment but distancing myself would just make her pull away further.

I gotta keep breathing. Because tomorrow the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring?