Waywards do come back. First step: LET GO

[BluWave]

I only have a few minutes, but was thinking about something and wanted to share while it was fresh in my mind.

So most of us are here because we are the LBS, because our S cheated and/or left us for OP, and because we want our M back. we feel terrible about ourselves, we feel hopeless, and we are further desperate for them to come back. We are increasing our cycle of low self esteem and dependency. We feel weaker, we look weaker, and we try harder. So we come to DB land in hopes of a fix.

We read Sandi's rules, and many of us post, only to read 2*4s, and then we feel more like a failure. We just can't seem to do it! All we want is our S back. Why isn't this working? It's not working because we are not actually doing it at all. I see many of you reading, posting, and reading and posting, but you are not actually doing it--you are not letting go, stepping back, going dark, 180, GAL, detaching, and to make matters worse, you are then beating yourself up for your failures. ... and round and round you go. ...

Haven't we all heard the stories of the people that cheat and then the W/H kicks them to the curb and moves on??? What does the cheater do? And why do they do it? ... The H/W that was cheated on are not posting here? Why??? Think about it for a minute. They have their S begging for forgiveness and to come back? What is different? Just chew on that for a few minutes ...

Blu