Thanks for reaching out - I read your post and I feel your pain. I think you're pretty amazing because you've realised the mistakes you made and you didn't go into the self pity party my husband used as an excuse to make his EA a full blown PA. I think you should give yourself some credit for that. You've shown your wife a lot more respect than my WH has ever shown me. I wish my WH was more like you - it takes awareness and a conscience to be in your position, as painful as it is.
Your advice is amazing and spot on. It's about self love. I have been willing to take this emotional beating, being nice to WH when I know he's going home to OW and living the life with her he should be living with his W, because of my guilt, my self hatred. Which serves no purpose but to make me weaker. So I will take your advice to heart. From now on am focussing on being a better self, and not wasting time on regretting the past. Thank you for sharing the insight - it's valuable and I can see was hard won.
