SBJ even if it's hard you have done the right thing by standing by, validating her. Your wife has to understand that life is made of choices (good or bad depending how you see it) and she made some of them that has changed her path, so therefore it's new territory for her and she needs to realise that her taking this path has changed the dynamics.
Keep on your side of the road and carry on with your life. You got fired as her H, so unfortunately she can no longer rely on you.
