Ugh, wish I could move out of this country for the next four years, SMH. This saddens me to read, and that it's becoming acceptable to some people, that is what troubles me! (((Sara))) Please do what feels right for you, on or off, but keep fighting for your civil liberties. Sadly, your children must learn to stand up to bullies too. .... I digress .....
In terms of your H. This doesn't surprise me at all. However my initial thought was that he has done this before. There was another time--soon before he moved home--that he softened and did a complete 180 on a whim. However, it didn't last long.
My thoughts are that he is acting based on pure emotions. That's dangerous because emotions are changing at all times--like blood pressure--they are never stagnant. I would like to see your H makes some changes in himself FIRST and then make a well thought out CHOICE about his M. Enough dragging you around.
I don't want to see him run you around or hurt you anymore. You were not the perfect W, none of us are, but how dare he come and go as he pleases with no regard for you or the kids' feelings and confusion he causes (light bulb moment my arse). One moment he is acting like a pouty baby and ignoring you, sitting in the back of the car. Then he is hugging you, loving you, and won't even leave your side! I'm sorry but that's what children do!
This reads like a teenager--emotional, impulsive, and not thinking about how his actions are affecting his future or everyone around him. I think you deserve better than this. You deserve a man.
Teach him how to treat you. Keep being the best version of you for YOU. In the mean time, if he wants to renter this M, like an adult, then let him show you with real and consistent actions over time.
He needs to respect you and know that you won't put up with this on-again off-again drama anymore. You can own your mistakes in your M and you can show him your changes. But you do not have to put up with this treatment and let him justify treating you this way because you made mistakes, that's not healthy, it's abusive and controlling. If he doesn't learn to respect you, my fear is he will yo-yo right back to being a pouty baby.
2*4 with love, Blu
“Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear. That is why it is such a powerful weapon.” – Nelson Mandela
