Gordie: Pulling it all together

[Gordie]

So W and I are discussing S agreement last night. We agree on almost everything. W says something which ticks me off and I respond in a way that ticks her off. Ugh. Then she says, this is why I want a D! Ugh. She explains why she was ticked off and I apologize but her feelings are hurt and my feelings are hurt.

W: do you know why I told you why I was ticked off?
Me: yes, because you were ticked off
W: and I wouldn't have told you that in the past
Me: so you would have held it in?
W: yes, and then what would have happened?
Me: you would be angry and resentful
W: so do you know why I told you?
Me: so you can express your feelings, let go of them, and change the way I talk to you?
W: yes (and then she gives me a long hug)

W is opening up to me and making efforts to work on our issues...yet, we're full speed ahead to separation and probably D...W keeps telling me she loves me and our R will be better after we separate...

LET HER GO...detach, don't pursue, be there for my kids, don't give up love, don't give up hope...maybe I can be one of those that reconciles after separation and divorce?