Try Not to Think Too Far Ahead

[roist]

I am glad you journalled here instead of sending those texts. My following comments are based only on your last few postings and as such I may have missed something.

We often get angry or frustrated or resentful when someone does not act as we EXPECTED. Think about whether that applies here and if those expectations are realist in current situation.

For example she has no obligation to phone kids. Why does that bother you so much? I accept contact with kids is important for them but not absolutely necessary for a few days. So why does this affect you so much? What is your EXPECTATION?

It is tough. I am just trying to help you change your thinking and hopefully stop the spinning.

Technically w is free to do what she wants with whoever she wants. All say in that is out of your control. Many vets say to assume the worst. Believe there is OM. That will stop you wondering or stressing in uncertainty.
What can you do to reduce how that affects you?

On a separate note, I don't see why you apologised. In this case based on what I read it was unnecessary and did you no favours. Apologising repeatedly or unnecessarily come across as weak, which is never attractive.

On a last note, don't let how she acts determine how you react.of course respect your boundaries, but you can be calm and friendlywhwther she deserves it or not. You be who you want to be.

Best wishes