Love is a decision - my story

[Seeker7]

Thank you Sandi, Your insight is so valuable and have learned so much from your posts. And form what I have been learning I have been putting into practice. I do not text or seen her in almost two months. I was calling her a couple of times a week up to over two weeks ago. Now I am just leaving it be and answering her calls when she does. The last thing I need to do is to get off the phone before she tells me she has to go when she calls.

Yes she had a PA and it did not last long. I do not know if she is involved with anyone else but I do know is she is talking to them on the phone apps. It feeds her Love Addiction. I have not heard anything on any OM and she is keeping it quiet from mutual friends and kids. I did not ask the kids but they have willing told me things in the past. Now from what I am learning is this is signs of guilt and uncertainty. If in your hart it is defiantly over then there is not need to hide it or lie about it. Another thing is and A that is kept hidden makes it that much more intense and thrilling. She has told the kids and mutual friends that she wishes for me to find someone to date but I am not doing that until the divorce is final if it happens at all. From what I have learned is that her wanting me to date will justify her actions in her own head. Just like when she hears about me not drinking anymore she says "that's nice." It sounds almost like a disappointment but I do not want to mind read it.

Yes you are correct that the turning point for me was the reality of me losing my family. It is the most important thing for me. And trust me I completely understand that negative circumstances change our outlook on things very quickly. I completely agree with you timing is everything and right now is not the time. So I will just continue on my GAL and see what happens over time. Time take time and you can not learn patience with out having to be patient.