So maybe I was pushing my luck just a bit. I noticed that condoms have an expiration date, and the two big boxes we had bought once upon a time had expired in 1997 and 1999 respectively. Since things were warming up a bit, I figured maybe one of these days something might happen, so I decided to buy some condoms and some Astroglide, which has received glowing reviews from some women here on the board.
So I tell my wife I'm going running in the woods and I'm going to do some errands after, and she asks me what errands. Hmmmm....since I really had only one errand in mind, I hemmed and hawed a bit and told her. And she went slightly ballistic, telling me that she didn't need all that pressure. I told her that having the supplies in the house meant that we could choose if we wanted to, and then stupidly said that we had already managed to avoid sex for years at a time while having unexpired condoms in the house (will I ever learn to shut my trap?)
At any rate, after running through the woods (which was very nice) I stopped at the local Wal-Mart and picked up the goods. This Wal-Mart seemed to be staffed entirely by 15-year-old girls, so I poked around quite a while rather than ask where to find things, and then went through an automated line. And one of these days I'm going to have to browse the Internet to figure out what the differences are among the 20-odd kinds they had on offer, but since I wasn't going to ask a 15-year-old girl, I picked up a small variety pack. 12 condoms that expire in 2008.
I also bought some Easter candy, eggs, etc., hid the more suspect goods, and finally decided to come out and tell my wife that I only bought 12, and they don't expire until 2008, so we have some time. She laughed and gave me a little hug, so I guess this wasn't a fatal mistake.
