cheesyt6 - 10months in and W is still far away..

[fightin]

Awe, cheesyt, I wish I could pick you up and hug all your pain away. You are worth so much more than tying yourself to whatever your W is trying to make you feel. She's crazy right now, and only looking out for herself or at least what she thinks she wants for herself. It will come crashing down eventually, I truly believe that, but until then cheesyt HAS TO take care of cheesyt!

Your D is smarter than your W is giving her credit for, and chances are D sees right through whatever she's hearing about you. My SS(11) knows exactly what is going on with his mom and he's made some pretty astute observations that surprised me, but I definitely think they see more than we think they do. Your W is just using D as a way to control you.

My W has done the same thing on and off. When she feels I'm playing by her rules she's good with me having a relationship with SS, when I shut her out she tries to take that relationship with him from me. Thankfully, his dad is cool and knows that SS wants me in his life so they make that happen regardless of W's behavior. I know that unfortunately you don't have that same kind of situation. For that I am truly sorry because I know you love your D very much and want nothing more than to be there for her. I hope your W will wake up, but if she doesn't, please remember it is most certainly her loss. Her using D as a tool is out of selfishness, I seriously doubt your D wanted you to be removed from her life and I'm sure she still loves you.

Try to remember you're amazing and that you're becoming more amazing each day that you carry on! Hugs!