I didn't ask for a response nor did I sit around to wait for one. And I have to say that this felt good for me. It's certainly not the tough love approach that some of you are advocating and I respect that. But I think this works better for me right now.
I think we all here need to read the book and take the advice with an open mind...but then apply what we think is best for our situation, for ourselves...
I re-read the chapter on MLC in DR. The chapter is aimed at wives but MWD indicates that it can also apply to WAW. Many of the behavior descriptions in that chapter remind me of my sitch.
Originally Posted By: Gordie
Originally Posted By: Chris73
And here's the most peculiar thing...for the very first time I started thinking about how I might NOT want to try to save my marriage. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE the way my W used to be. But it was clear through our interaction tonight that she's really changed, and not for the better. The selfishness that she disguises as her "new wide-awake self" is starting to show its true colors. She talks a good game, but I'm really starting to see that she's not thinking clearly. I also think that she drinks too much...This gave me some clarity and might possibly have been a moment when I detached a bit further.
Wow, I haven't gotten here yet; maybe that's why I'm having detachment issues.
It was kind of an "a-ha!" moment for me. It doesn't take away any of the sorrow and pain caused by her betrayal of the M, but it does feel like a bit of the load is off my shoulders.
M46 W48 M11 T14 S11 D8 BD: 2016/05/27 In-home separation: 2016/11/23 Nesting: 2017/06/11 W moves out: 2018/01/07 W goes public with OM: 2018/07/12 I ask for a divorce: 2018/12/14
