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MrBond #2724242 01/06/17 05:20 AM
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maly Offline OP
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Yep,I've ordered them,just waiting for them to arrive,looking forward to reading,


Me 56 w52
M30 years
4x adult kids
W dad died/11
W wanted d 03/12
In-house sep 03/12
D 2014 I pushed
W Left on 02/16 I pushed
Pa on 07/16
Nc after 07/16
W Cakeating 15to16
Me doormat 12to16
Limbo 12to16
lt0402 #2724243 01/06/17 05:37 AM
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Posts: 174
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maly Offline OP
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Hi my friend,can't do much keep fit stuff,has I have heart disease,but I'm getting on well with my family and friends,I'm there more for my children,they are hurting cos she is distancing from them,I do plenty of walking,I've got my self new cloths,keep my self tidy looking,got a couple of lady friends who are nice,only friends tho,I'm also trying to redecorate all the house,I've done 2 rooms,I'm feeling fairly good in my self,I will get there slowly but surely,I seem to be getting stronger each day but still have some down days,she broke my heart and hurt me purity bad,but I will recover,I've learned in my life when you get knocked down you must get back up,that's life,last thing to do is give up,I'm a fighter,


Me 56 w52
M30 years
4x adult kids
W dad died/11
W wanted d 03/12
In-house sep 03/12
D 2014 I pushed
W Left on 02/16 I pushed
Pa on 07/16
Nc after 07/16
W Cakeating 15to16
Me doormat 12to16
Limbo 12to16
lt0402 #2724246 01/06/17 06:12 AM
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 174
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maly Offline OP
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The last time I spoke to my wife was in July the day I found out about the hotel affair,I did blow my top and told her what I fought of her I wasent nice,after all she was cake eating,and I saw all the lies she had been telling me,she called the police and I was told to leave,that was the last time we spoke,I've just stayed away from her since no contact at all,,am I doing the right thing staying away no contact in any way,I know the affair is still on going and think it must of been going on at least 3 months before I found out,


Me 56 w52
M30 years
4x adult kids
W dad died/11
W wanted d 03/12
In-house sep 03/12
D 2014 I pushed
W Left on 02/16 I pushed
Pa on 07/16
Nc after 07/16
W Cakeating 15to16
Me doormat 12to16
Limbo 12to16
maly #2724247 01/06/17 06:16 AM
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 174
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maly Offline OP
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Posts: 174
I feel like RoboCop in the first movie I'm old and obsolete and she is looking for the younger improved ed209 version,in her eyes,lol


Me 56 w52
M30 years
4x adult kids
W dad died/11
W wanted d 03/12
In-house sep 03/12
D 2014 I pushed
W Left on 02/16 I pushed
Pa on 07/16
Nc after 07/16
W Cakeating 15to16
Me doormat 12to16
Limbo 12to16
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 291
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Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 291
That's a great post from Jack_Three_Beans, thanks for linking to it AP.

Some very wise words in there. I particularly like this:

"Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans"


--
Me: 47 WW: 35
SS: 17 D: 5
T: 7 yrs Engaged: 2 yrs
OEA confirmed: August 17 2016 ongoing since April 2016.
OEA continues (with occasional breaks)
BD2 - W says will visit OM in Jan 18
maly #2724249 01/06/17 06:27 AM
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Posts: 174
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maly Offline OP
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And my new hobby is being a better cook I'm learning how to cook better quality food and meals I'm enjoying that,it makes me feel good,but usually do to much and make a pig of my self and eat to much but not to often so its OK lol


Me 56 w52
M30 years
4x adult kids
W dad died/11
W wanted d 03/12
In-house sep 03/12
D 2014 I pushed
W Left on 02/16 I pushed
Pa on 07/16
Nc after 07/16
W Cakeating 15to16
Me doormat 12to16
Limbo 12to16
maly #2724257 01/06/17 07:37 AM
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 18,666
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You said her mother had similar behavior. Was her mother ever diagnosed with bipolar? Did her mother get back to her normal self?

Was there something in your W's youth that was very difficult for her, maybe even life changing in some way? How old was she when her mother began her inappropriate behavior?


It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
sandi2 #2724261 01/06/17 07:47 AM
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Posts: 174
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maly Offline OP
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Hi Sandi,no bipoler but that was over 30 years ago,
She had a lot of men and ended up with nothing,
Wife was 10 years old'
There was a big life changing issue with wife's farther in 2010 but can't say on here'
It damaged the whole family including me,


Me 56 w52
M30 years
4x adult kids
W dad died/11
W wanted d 03/12
In-house sep 03/12
D 2014 I pushed
W Left on 02/16 I pushed
Pa on 07/16
Nc after 07/16
W Cakeating 15to16
Me doormat 12to16
Limbo 12to16
maly #2724965 01/10/17 06:54 AM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 13,555
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Originally Posted By: maly
Wife was 10 years old

I think what Sandi was getting at is sometimes in a MLC people go back in time mentally to an age when they had issues to try to resolve those issues and replay their lives forward from that point.

Childhood issues are at play.


Me-70, D37,S36
Cadet #2724971 01/10/17 07:36 AM
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maly Offline OP
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Hi cadet,yep that figures,she had it hard then took place of her mother and looked after 4 other siblings,but just wondered am I doing right,with total no contact since July,I've been there for her right up till then nearly 40 years,but in July I told her after I learned of the affair and cakeating your on your own now and I'm no longer your best friend,


Me 56 w52
M30 years
4x adult kids
W dad died/11
W wanted d 03/12
In-house sep 03/12
D 2014 I pushed
W Left on 02/16 I pushed
Pa on 07/16
Nc after 07/16
W Cakeating 15to16
Me doormat 12to16
Limbo 12to16
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