Welcome to 2017 DB'rs. Sad to see so many new faces but happy that some others are getting on with things and are in a better place.
Things have been good. I have been doing all my usual activities and even tried out a spin class which was pretty awesome. I just hate the winter up here... ugh.
Starting in early December, I became super distant from WW. I never initiated contact or asked her to get together. I have to give her credit. She kept coming and never stopped. She would text me first every morning even though I was never reaching out. The holidays were good, we got together a few times. About a week before Christmas she asked me if we were exchanging gifts because she said she knew exactly what to get me. I said no that's ok. But I did get our nieces some small things. I love those girls.
New year's was coming and I was still pretty distant. She asked the day before if I wanted to do something because she didn't have any plans. I said I wasn't sure if I was going out with friends and I would let her know. Nothing ended up happening with my friends so I let her know at late afternoon on new year's eve we could get together. She ended coming over and spending the night. Nothing physical happened but it was pretty good. She came over yesterday for a bit and we had a small R talk. She said that I am not vested 100% emotionally. I said that is true, but it is hard for me to just commit and go all in after all that happened. She said she understands but she wishes I could try a bit. OK... fair enough.
So that's what I will do. It either works out or it doesn't. I think I am in a good spot for either outcome. I have two things I want to bring up and discuss outside of everything else we have to work out. First, I want to talk about kids and see where she stands. Second, and I will be real interested to hear what people think about this, I think I want to discuss a post-nup. We weren't married long so things would be pretty easy now in case of divorce but a few more years down the road and things will get very complex.
I got an email from my mom to start the new year saying that it is time for me to move on and there are plenty of other fish in the sea. She also said she thought that WW was 'emotionally, verbally and possibly physically abusive" towards me. This really got me going. Things are hard enough, I already know the opinion of everyone who is close to me. Even though it was a well intentioned note, I felt it was selfish on her part. What does this email do for me?... nothing. The abusive stuff is a bunch of garbage and not something to just throw around. No idea where she got that from but it really bothered me. Even if it were true, she would have no idea.
Anyway, keep on keeping on. 2017 is gonna be a-ok.
