Help - Setting Boundaries, WW in EA - Thread #2

[Surfer]

Woke_Up

Do not engage with her. You are arguing in front of the kids again. STOP. She is pushing your buttons because you are letting her. You will damage yourself, your R and most importantly the kids. Your D is being forced to defend you as you are not drawing boundaries yourself. Is that fair? Get some boundary statements in place. Something like 'this is nonsense, I can't help you with it, I am. Ot here for this any more' ' then exit.

She is manipulating you, the bed, the affection, the 'non Alpha Male' conversation is total gas lighting and spew. She is defining you. YOU define you, not her! Got it? Boundaries. Develop and enforce them. See above.

My W said I we will have the house and you can have a charge on it. Yes of course dear right away dear, when do you want me to move out again, later today? Okay. Shall I make the bed for OM so it's comfy when he gets here. One statement. Foxtrott Oscar. No. See a L. Then do nothing. It's her journey. Her crazy train.

Finally, get out and enjoy your life. Make sure your job is secure and you are secure. That way your kids are. Stop acting like a doormat and grow some again. Everything you engage with her so takes a piece of you. Don't - get out with friends, go for a walk, run. Let her wonder if you are having an affair - don't of course. But do let her wonder. It will do you good for her to see some mystery in you - I.e where is he, who's he with etc.

Surfer.