Gordie the more you talk the more you and your W sound like me and my W.

We go out of town to say in hotels and ML and order room service. That's been our thing for almost two decades.

She was also a SAHM who built up a lot of resentment and often had "suggestions" as to how she could be doing better than I. This is part of how the WW convinces herself that you aren't such a catch after all.

But she wants you. And she wants the OM. We had this kind of dynamic too. It's her being indecisive. Don't worry about this right now because it's beyond your control

The OM is complete opposite to you. It's ALWAYS like this. If you don't drink, he's a drinker. If you don't like tattoos, he has full body tattoos. If you are against guns, he has racks full of guns. If you are successfully, he is most certainly a loser with a dead end job and no career. The OM is ALWAYS the low lying fruit picked from the lowest hanging branches. A bottom feeder who has no issues with flirting with married women.

Your sitch is progressing according to the script. Nothing out of the ordinary here

Your coach gave you the same advice I was given, and my sitch was almost EXACTLY like yours. Light touch in a subtle way is a powerful thing. You have the advantage over OM. You have shared history with her. You have shared kids. You know her better than he does. And, he's a kid himself!

She's stringing you along as far as her saying she doesn't know if OM is interested. She knows he is. And they've fooled around. I can almost bet my money on that. Is that a deal breaker for you or can you look past it for an R?

I'll be back later with more questions.


Me, H-34 now 38
W-32 now 35
T-13 now 18 years
M-6 now 9
Daughter 3 years now 7
Bomb 11/27/12 - OM
1 year in house separation
Reconciliation 12/2013. Healed now 2017