Hope everyone had a good Christmas and is having a good start to their new year!
It's been a little while so I thought I'd journal.
Christmas was a little rough but I got through it. I was doing okay but Christmas Eve and the following morning were tough. I missed staying up with W and the kids in the morning. W was not easy to deal w/over the holidays. We had very little contact but she sent some PA texts from her about splitting the gifts because the things she ordered didn't show up in time (she later told me they came to her friend's neighbor and he sent them back instead of brining them over) and she had to do extra shopping. I didn't reply. She did thank me later for the gifts I took the kids to get for her but that was about it. She was pretty awful. She was supposed to bring them back to me the Monday after Christmas and knew I was planning on spending Tuesday with them. They didn't come back because of the weather which I'm certainly fine with but the next day she didn't leave until almost 5 so they got back super late driving on bad roads. There was no one was even at step in laws Tuesday so they spent all day there by themselves. I think she did it on purpose. I took another day off and the kids chose to spend the next couple days with me at my office so that was nice even though I was sick again all last week.
In addition to being sick one of the dogs had pups which ended up being an all night event with a C-section in the morning so I've been entirely run down and just getting back to normal again. W stayed here that night and was nice all week. She stayed here over the weekend and I took the kids to my parents for a late Christmas. She texted with me a little bit over the weekend and was nice. I was nice back but kept things a little short. It made me really miss her over the weekend. Then Monday she was texting about getting the kids before I even got home. The way she asked rubbed me wrong and I was very short with my texts, then she got agitated. I think she was just excited to take them to her new apartment now that I think about it.
She called me at work Tuesday and talked for 10-15 minutes then didn't have any communication all week until today. She was texting a lot this morning. They started friendly then turned to our schedule, lunch money, apologized about the snow pants (she found them in her stuff after repeatedly insisting that I had them and used them a couple weeks ago but was referring to something we did 2-3 years ago), then she wanted to take the dog and pups to her apartment. I told her it wasn't a good idea (she's not supposed to have pets and it only got up to ~5 degrees today) then she got short.
I feel a lot more collected today, I've calmed down and feel like I can once again dig deeper for some patience and to keep trying to DB and detach. I've been spinning big time over the last couple weeks. Feeling some depression, resentment, anger, then an urge to pursue on NY, and back around again but at least I realize when it's happening now and can try to deal with it better.
