MLC W and preparing for S or D in the new year

[Gordie]

"I want her to give me some words of affirmation"

This is the only actual 'goal' you have listed. Now what steps have you done to try and achieve that goal and how long of a time are you going to see if your plan works before maybe changing it?

You need a more comprehensive list of goals.

Hmmm...thanks for the help...let's try again...re-reading Step Number 2 in DR:

Smaller items:

I want to talk to her one-on-one about non-logistical (and non R) things for at least 15 minutes per day. My steps have been to make sure I am available to her to do this and that she knows she has my full attention. Usually, this includes pouring a glass of wine and sitting down together in the evening without the children. I would say I am achieving this about 4x per week and the other days she is working at home or she is not at home. We have longer talks on date night, which are still happening 1x per week.

I want her to initiate sex. My steps have been to increase emotional connection, increase non-sexual touching, giving her alone time at the end of the day to de-stress, and going to bed at the same time. This has resulted in her initiating about 2x per month since BD.

I want her to give me some words of affirmation. My steps have been to tell her that this is important to me and to thank her when she does it. She now does it unprompted about 1x per week.

Are these better articulated goals?

I'm not writing down bigger things like...I don't want to get S or D...or I want her to end her R with POM...