MLC W and preparing for S or D in the new year

[Gordie]

"Did you actually read DB or DR? You seem to be mixing up the concepts"

Start with your list of goals and the actions and timeline that you are going to achieve those goals.

Thanks for the prompt. It made me realize I hadn't considered my goals since when I first read the book two months ago, so here's a first draft (open to suggestions):

*I want to stop pursuing/putting R pressure on my W (not initiating calls and texts, R talks, or sexual activity...let her do the initiating)

*When we are physically together, I want to be emotionally present to my W (look her in the eye when she talks to me, really focus on what she is saying, listening to her and showing that I understand what she is saying, not getting distracted, being open to whatever she wants to discuss or feelings she wants to express...this is an ongoing issue)

*I want her to give me some words of affirmation (I haven't actually asked for this directly other than she read 5LL years ago and she is aware that I just did...but these have actually started to trickle in...last week was about my appearance...this week it was about the car I bought her this spring...this is an ongoing issue)

*I want to be emotionally detached from the S process and discussions (this just started and is a new challenge; I have been quickly and professionally providing documents and responses to all questions; business like, not emotional and she has been appreciative...this is a January issue, may take longer, not sure...)

*If I do move out...then I want to be back home by...June (this is a stretch goal...but why not shoot for it?)