Told her can't do it. Actually wrote her that yesterday, immediately after posting my question. I just knew I couldn't be in the same house while she was seeing other people. Good to have your input/confirmations though.
Things are in flux. I'll be posting more, I'm sure.
Me: 50, MLC/WW 45 Young kids Nov 2015: BD1 Apr 2016: BD2 Jan 2017: W filed Feb 2017: D final