It's so good that you are off the roller coaster of your WH's dysfunction. About your WH asking about the pregnancy, I take that as a good sign, his curiosity may be an indication of the fog starting to dissipate, or at least some reality to start sinking in. Keep detaching though, keep yourself protected and safe.
M 10yrs T 13yrs BD #1Oct 2015-PA between WAH and COW BD #2 April 2016-WH resumed PA, she broke it off Jan 2 2017 WH says he wants divorce April '17-Letting go 2018 D busted DD8, DS6, DS3
Happy new year all, I hope 2017 brings you all peace and happiness. I'm doing alright. I don't come on here as much as I did, kind of unintentionally, I'm constantly busy, and also sometimes it gets me thinking.
All in all, I'm doing okay, getting quite heavily pregnant and uncomfortable now, the idea that by the end of next month I could have my baby here on my arms is both scary and exciting at the same time. I'm still working too, so that on top of single parenting and preparing for a new baby is very tiring. I treat myself to a lovely warm bath every night!
The Christmas period was one I was dreading, but I actually enjoyed spending time with family who love and care for me. Don't really see much of wh, last time I saw him, he decided he was going to blank me at all costs and told his mom he came to see her and S, I get that, but he is still flat out rude, unpredictable and very much in his fog.
Still I leave him to it, I honestly don't have the energy to get bogged down in his thought process of shall I be nice to her or shall I blank her. Though his ignorance did annoy me, because he actually made me feel like I was a spare part and shouldn't have been there in my own home. Still no word on the divorce front, I don't ask him, I said I wouldn't help him, so I don't. He refers to us as "separated" whereas I refer to us as in the early stages of divorce. Still, again, not focussing on him.
Me 26 H 25 M 4 T 5 Baby born 4/14 BD: 1/15 EA: 2/15 PA: 4/15 reconciling: 4/15 ILYBINILWY- 11/15 ILY-1/16 ILYBNILWY 4/16 ILY 6/16 ILYBINILWY 6/16 Baby due 3/17 BD 8/16
I must add despite pregnant women bursting into tears about all sorts, I haven't cried over him in quite a long time. The last man I cried over was the news about George Michael. My first crush, and a beautiful, lovely, genuine, but lonely and troubled soul.
Me 26 H 25 M 4 T 5 Baby born 4/14 BD: 1/15 EA: 2/15 PA: 4/15 reconciling: 4/15 ILYBINILWY- 11/15 ILY-1/16 ILYBNILWY 4/16 ILY 6/16 ILYBINILWY 6/16 Baby due 3/17 BD 8/16
I literally gasped when I heard the news about George Michael, he was an awesome performer. You are sounding strong and confident my friend. Keep on, keepin' on.
M 10yrs T 13yrs BD #1Oct 2015-PA between WAH and COW BD #2 April 2016-WH resumed PA, she broke it off Jan 2 2017 WH says he wants divorce April '17-Letting go 2018 D busted DD8, DS6, DS3
Sara it's just so sad. I grew up hearing my mom playing his music. He was so talented in many ways, gave so much to charities and had a great sense of humour. I would have loved to have met himh.
I am feeling a lot stronger and a lot more confident, but the occasional bit of spew can really anger me. I've recently heard him rewriting history to his mom of how he was never happy with me, and it was all a lie. And while I know he is rewriting history, it angers me that he is disrespecting me in my own home, while I'm carrying his child. It makes me feel as though I have been used. In fact I heard him while I was in the bathroom say this, I had to wait until he left before I came out, because I do know if I was face to face to him, I would have errupted and threw him out. I find that he angers me more than anything now, he sees S for about an hour once a week, and I feel like it's just a time killer as he always has somewhere to be. He's still swimming in his fog, but his negative energy really attacks the calm that I have made my home into.
Me 26 H 25 M 4 T 5 Baby born 4/14 BD: 1/15 EA: 2/15 PA: 4/15 reconciling: 4/15 ILYBINILWY- 11/15 ILY-1/16 ILYBNILWY 4/16 ILY 6/16 ILYBINILWY 6/16 Baby due 3/17 BD 8/16
I have been wondering how you are. You seem to be doing just fine and I am pleased about that. As for WH, meh, leave him to it is all I can say.
Whether you call it separated or early stages of divorce it's the same as your separation is not moving towards reconciliation. The fact you describe it as early stages of divorce is perhaps good. It shows you have moved on. He will rewrite history forever. So what, your MIL and those that know and love you know the truth. People are not stupid.
I have moved on also. I have come to terms with the fact that my M has ended. I have even been out for drinks/meal with someone I met who knows the sitch. Seems really nice but nothing serious. You will do this in time also. Be careful for full on limerance however. When you have been deprived of LL's, acts of kindness etc for such a long time you really do lap it up and that could be dangerous.
The following month or so will no doubt bring you, your S and family such joy. I am looking forward to hearing about that. Keep being super mum/super you! I will think of you later down the gym spa - it's my pampering a jacuzzi (no beans required - ha ha)!.
Surfer.
M46/W40/D8/S6/T20/M12/Separated 6/2016,W takes kids Issues2009 Wpartying w/g.f's2013on EA2013PAdeniedWleavesMBR ImeetAP/EAhalts VariousBDDates MFCourse WSpew EAresumes I halt Wrages DBIng4/2016
Glad to see you in a more positive mindset too, not too long ago we never thought we would be here.
My concern is less about intense limerance but quite the opposite, it's possibly a phase. I just feel like I'm going to struggle to trust someone, there's trusting someone towards my children, and then trusting someone not to hurt me.
I do have phases of feeling hurt and disappointed. I do realise that those feelings I have are those towards a person who has long gone.
Me 26 H 25 M 4 T 5 Baby born 4/14 BD: 1/15 EA: 2/15 PA: 4/15 reconciling: 4/15 ILYBINILWY- 11/15 ILY-1/16 ILYBNILWY 4/16 ILY 6/16 ILYBINILWY 6/16 Baby due 3/17 BD 8/16
