Moving on to the next phase

[Sotto]

Hi Pax, I understand your fears and I also found it difficult to quietly challenge XH's unrealistic perceptions of how a settlement should play out. This is why it helps to have L's. You don't need to deal with him directly at all and as long as you have been as careful as you can be with disclosures and so on, that's as much as you can do.

For XH, I found that once he had his own L, he became more realistic. Do bear in mind that his L in the background is going to be challenging unrealistic expectations on his part.

So, I would say finish off this last piece of information, breathe a sigh of relief and then start to think with your L about what would be a fair and realistic settlement in all circumstances. And if your H chooses to be unrealistic, overbearing, competitive or whatever - that's up to him and it needn't rattle you at all Sweetie xx