where to begin or end? #2

[coffee_]

My thoughts on fighting for full custody stem from my kids not needing OM in their lives, and feeling what is best for them by removing them from my wifes adulterous behavior. Im sure some of it is amplified by spite. Idk. Im not sure how to word or enforce my desire for the kids to not be around OM and the affair until something is more legal.

GALing and making new friends is proving more difficult than one fantasizes. Very few peers are in a place to be available to going out, they all have their own busy lives and families.

My daughter commented that OM hopes to meet me one day... Im not sure how i intend to deal with that if the day comes. I hope it never does. If i unlock my anger, he may end up vegetative! If i avoid confrontation or walk away, that seems like rolling over on my back! Any successful DB'rs have wise thoughts?

I struggle with this too. I really don't want to see her with the OM or any other man for that matter, it will hurt. I have been separated for 7 months and out of the house for 5 months and all I can say is that thought drifts further away from me. I too thing that at a minimum if I see one of the guys she had an A with I will punch them as hard as I can in the nose. I live in a relatively small town (25k people) so running into them is pretty likely. I have been kind of being a hermit these past 5 months, not going out unless I have to. However I have been traveling to another close by town and spending time with a girl that I have met. It has helped me. Divorce is messed up, a skewed reality, kids will meet new people from both sides eventually. Do you have any divorced friends that have remarried? I have spent time with my good friend and their blended family. They have gotten along nicely and are successful and happy. It is kind of good to see that it can be done. [censored] that your kids will be spending time with the OM but they do need their mother.

I also get that its hard to GAl with friends, they all have stuff going on especially with the holidays just getting over. I managed to scrape by but spent some time alone for sure. During my alone time I did things that I never had time to do when I was active in the MR. For instance I started sketching again. I have also looked into a local community wood shop where people gather and share ideas. I have lost that outlet since I left my marital home, no more shop. It is funky because when I was married I loved my alone time but now all I want to do is spend time with people. But as time goes on I remember that I need my alone time to make things, draw things or tinker in the shop on things. I think GAL doesn't have to involve other people, what are some things that you sacrificed doing while meeting your obligations as a Husband and father? You need to start doing those, it won't come natural but once your start you'll start to enjoy it I promise.