WW asks for divorce, what now?

[Jrnymn]

Thank you. I think the more I studied about what she possibly could be going through and things horrible from her past made me understand her, even feel sorry for her. I had to watch myself because I was so codependant that I started to make excuses for her. I took on the consequences and tried to be responsible to fix it. I meant she did not want to pray, connect in any way. That is why I stopped having expectations. She didnt want to plan, didnt want to do anything but forget. She even now when anything comes up says that was ## years ago. get over it. So she just wants it to go away, but you are so right about how everything is my fault. I dont disagree with the fualts she has pointed out, but they arent the reason she is who she is nor why she did what she did. She choose and hasnt felt a loss of anything that I see other than self worth maybe. But when I stopped worrying about her and focused on the kids, I didnt want to snuggle each night knowing it was a comfort for her but not a connection to me. That is when she sought out her really wayward friend and is finding validation there. SHe hasnt had a person that has called her out and told her to suck it up, take it and go to work hard. I did and it saved my life.