Keep Wearing Wedding Band? [Thread #6]

[lt0402]

AP--
I can say I've always had the best intentions, and never acted with any malice or petty feelings.

FG, this speaks to the strength of your character. We all end up doing "little dumb things" because none of us are perfect, so it's not worth dwelling on. But knowing that there is truly no malice behind your actions, even in the face of such a horrible situation, is something to be proud of. End of the day, stand tall because you are a good man my friend.

I think a big potential point of contention coming up will be the MBR issue. I don't want to get into the details of how it came to be, but the aforementioned health issue has put the MBR issue into flux, and we will have to come to a new agreement. I never felt very territorial about parts of the house, and I'm not a big nester, but I have come to feel a need to make a principled stand on the MBR (although I have continuing, niggling doubt that it's petty to care about it).

There is a loud, conflict-avoider voice in me that says just go w/ the flow, but I feel like I'm too accommodating on that front. I do want the MBR, and I don't want to be a refugee in my own house. But how to do it w/o sounding petty ... I'm not sure.

I know that conflict-avoider voice very well. Seems to be a trait a lot of us share here. To your statement before about being well intentioned, just ask yourself if making a stand on the MBR is the right thing to do. If it is then absolutely stand for it and push back on her. If it's important to you, then it definitely is not petty. There's bound to be another option to accommodate the change in health situation (which I'm sorry to hear about brother).

I'm sorry you're going through a rough spot right now FG. The ups and downs definitely suck. How're you doing w/ yourself right now? Sleeping ok? Exercising? As you know from my experience, I tend to get those ups and downs when I'm lacking on either of those fronts. anything you could be doing for yourself right now to help alleviate some of the ups and downs?

The in-house S thing IS awful. It's not something I'd wish on anyone. The sheer uncertainty and amount of emotion that comes from being martially S, but constantly physically in contact with our WWs wears on us. It feels like being stuck in a hole w/ no way to get yourself out of it. I completely understand what you're going through right now.

That said, you are one of the stronger folks on here my friend. You always have a rational, well thought out approach to things and you're a great man. I think you already know that these ups and downs won't last and are only temporary. Be strong brother and know that we're here for you.