done my head in

[maly]

Hello all'im not to good at this let me first say what fantastic people you all are and great place this is for people like me I wish I had found it sooner I will try and put my story in short'
All started march 2012'me and wife had big argument she was going out with friends a lot but would not go any where with me then she said I want a divorce so I ended up sleeping on couch down stairs she had bedroom if she did not get her own way she would go into a rage some times attacking me so I let her have her own way I couldent talk to her couldent reason with her I was non eggshells most of the time I was kind of in shock 'then after about 6 months of me staying out of the way in the front room and her in bedroom all the time 'we some how ended up sleeping together a lot,over the next 4 years on and off,I was kind of in a daze did not understand,we would be like normal for 3 months then not talk for 2 months after an argument over nothing,did notice in June 2014 she was going out dolled up a lot but she said there was nothing going on and all ways saying she loved me and she would never be unfaithful and I believed her,we have 4 adults kids 2 at home ,and married for 30 years,then in early 2015 we had big argument and this time I started to fight back kept telling her to get a divorce I wanted it we can't go on like this I kind of kept pushing her and we divorced,but it carried on her upstairs me downstairs but sleeping together for months then having argument and not talking just cycling I was in no mans land thought I was going nuts,she seemed happy with this setup,then early 2016 we argued and started saying you need to get your own place now and get out I was nasty saying it to her all the time,,then in February she got a place and moved out,then some how she ended up staying at my place 3 times a week and I would go round hers still saying she loved me and she would never be unfaithull to me and again I believed her,in may 2016 things seemed better she was being nice we was going out together a lot but she dident want anyone to know,then in June I noticed she was being different and not wanting to see me much ,I asked if she was seeing some one gut instinct,she said no,this went on for a bit,then one night I followed her and she went to hotel and met with a Nigerian coworker,that was it not spoke since that was in July 2016,then in November she got new convertable car,and they been having lot of so called work party's,,this has done my head in,she was a good mother and wife for 30 years,now I don't know who she is,in feel drained with it all,