How do you guys do it!? How do you not retaliate? I am so tempted to go see her family and explain what she is doing as well as her close friends. Some people say this is a good idea while others say it isn't. I do feel like it would at least put pressure on her to see that what she is doing is wrong.
I was tempted to expose the A to my W's family and came very close to doing it. But in the end, I didn't and today I'm glad I didn't. This is a private matter between you and your W. Bringing family into the mix likely won't help the situation and probably will make it worse. You have to take the high road here. You have to be able to do the things that your W can't or won't do. You have to set the example. You have to be the lighthouse.
Sotto gave you some really good advice. Follow it. Stand up for yourself. Find your inner strength. Dont let her trample all over you. Detach, 180 and GAL. Stop spying on her and put ALL of your attention on yourself.
Me: 48 y/o W: 47 y/o Together: > 20 yrs BD: Dec '15, then S 2nd BD: Mar '16, then I filed for D April '16: started piecing
