Not sure where I am so no title!

[Coly23]

Hey AP, great to hear from you! I am also worried that H will start to pull back after the festive season but I won't know until like you say the stroje of midnight on NYE when everything turns to dust!

However, H did text me yesterday and asked to take myself and D out to lunch on NY day (I promise I did not ask him first!) so maybe that's a positive? IDK, these days i'm afraid to take anything as a positive unless it's an outright apology and H is grovelling to come back. It seems baby steps don't count in the world of MLC!

I am spinning today a bit though AP. I've had an invitation to go to my Sister's for NY Eve but I'm not sure I am up to it. I haven't asked H what he is doing but I don't think it will be a wild night for him otherwise he wouldn't be asking to see us the next day but I really want to be with him on NY Eve. It hurts so much I just want this year to be over with and to just sleep through NY Eve. I think about all the couples making promises to each other at the stroke of midnight and it breaks my heart.

I know I have developed a better relationship with my H than some on this board and I like to think that some of this is due to my DB'ng but nit sure everyone will agree! A couple of months ago H would take hours even days to respond to a text but now he responds soon after. He has become softer in his interactions with me and talks about US and WE. But when I read through the old posts and see the baby steps in their R's and then D in the signature it makes me so sad and want to just give up.

I'm sorry for the down post. I will be ok once NY Eve is out of the way.

Wishing you and everyone on this board a wonderful NY full of hope, love and happiness! X