Hanging and hoping- seperation edition

[Bman72]

Hi Billy, I'm glad you spoke with a coach - I am also glad to hear that you see friendship as a good start point and will nurture that - for now just living on her own may be all the space she needs to get clarity and feel like she is getting what she needs for the time being. What she ultimately does is unknown but you are controlling what you can and giving her opportunity for friendship. Your family and friends are protecting you and so it's easy for them to tell you to mlove on as they care for you and want to see you be happy because you deserve it. It's a throw away comment to tell you to move on and comes from caring about you but if they were in your situation they would see it differently also. Sometimes family and friends are not the best people to take advice from - keep your plan and focus on working it every day and see their concern and comments purely as a sign of their love for you but keep your real constructive support to those who understand such as as a coach, counselor, priest etc. As I mentioned in my earlier post - you have set a good tone for your situation where your W feels safe communicating with you which is really a great start point for growth - no matter how slow. I have been criticized in the past for mentioning building connnection but without this you have no viable way to reconcile - I think you are handling it well. Boundaries are always important but only to keep things how you need them to be and not to control your wife - just keep on focusing on making yourself the best version of you - for yourself and the kids, and find your inner happiness. That's all you can do in reality - but you know the saying "build it and they will come " :-)