That's me in the spotlight

[Altair]

Hi all,
journaling.
I do have a request for advice. How to DB/NC/180/whathave you in a medical situation with an MLC/WH?

I got a call this am (in vegas) more tests are needed. I'm not feeling too good/positive about my health right now. But adding to that is this. So H wants to be kept in the loop, says he cares, but come on. It's not going to happen in any normal way. I texted him the latest, 5 hours later I get some sort of 'ok, thanks for letting me know' reply.

This isn't okay, for my mental health (as if any of this crisis has been okay). I guess what I am saying right now (which is weird) is that healthy, I was able to stand and tolerate his MLC depression, and i guess I cannot right now. It's too hurtful and insane. What should I do? I havent' done anything, just a few updating texts, but now I am feeling like, why does he deserve even this? My health situation is trumping his depression (I think). Or I just smile and get a text from him once in a blue moon and find other support. Or call him out on everything. Or plan my funeral (morbid joke). I know MLCers can't care about our health when they are in the thick of things. H wants to be kept in the loop-- or whatever minimal MLC loop on their terms loop-- do I go along with that? or disappear? What is best for me? That's really what I am grappling with. I'm in a bit of an anger phase- I don't care about his depression right now- I'd like to make it to 50, thank you very much.