Okay, so there were sex issues with him. But how did the two of you interact before all of this stuff started? Way back before OM, what was your MR like? Did you speak and treat him with respect, or were you a b'tch? Did you show him admiration, and did he cherish you?
The way he is treating you since discovering OM, is it the same way he has acted in the past?
H has always had a "mean streak" when he gets mad...nothing physical, but verbally, yes, although its never been as bad as he is right now with this situation. Its always been an issue with us when he gets mad, he gets cruel. In the past, when I point it out to him, he would get quiet like he knows he's taking it too far, but in this situation when I tell him he can be angry, mad, hurt...whatever he wants, but to keep it "civil", he says he has free reign to say and treat me however he wants. So to answer your question, yes, he's always kind of been this way, but never so openly and freely.
As far as our relationship, like I mentioned before, we were best friends. Respect? thats a hard one. I didn't openly disrespect him (prior to OM) but I've always inwardly not respected him for certain things, such as the way he handles conflicts. I hate talking "bad" about him right now, because one of the things I am working on is not speaking ill of him. H always ALWAYS spoke highly of me to everyone prior to this. I had been focusing on the negative and beginning to realize that all of the things I talk to others about H have been negative...not so forward like saying I hate him and what not, but just complaining about him, then realizing I haven't said anything nice and ending the conversation with, but that's my H and I love him. He can never admit he's wrong and say he's sorry. He treats my family horribly because they are "messed up", and he's better than them. So honestly, no, I haven't respected him, but I don't know if that issue lies with him or me...or both.
