Not sure where I am so no title!

[Coly23]

Thank you all for your comments I appreciate your honesty.

I am still so confused. I spent months not saying anything, not having any R talks, having minimal contact to no contact and my sitch was at a standstill. Friends and family encouraged me to talk to H but I refused. Now it seems to be slowly moving I don't want to go back to that time again. There was zero progress and it didn't do my mental health any good.

Also I think there might be some confusion over H's comments about me not having any R talks. I did not initiate nor did I intend to initiate ant R talks with him. That was just a comment he made because I was annoyed about the time he was intending to come over in Xmas eve. It made me annoyed because I have left him alone in his man cave except for one melt down so I did not think he was justified in his comments. It didn't spoil out evening though. In fact we had a great time and the fact that we could both forget about our little argument earlier in the day is a positive step as in the past we probably would have both just sulked!

I'm going to observe what happens after Xmas and see if H is still interested in continuing to see us or if it is just a seasonal thing. He did say that he would like to start up coming over once a week to spend as a family and that happened before Christmas. For me I understood DB'ng was trying different things and observing, adjusting and not continuing to go down cheesless tunnels. If H kept refusing to come and see me that would be a cheesless tunnel and I would have stopped asking. And off course if he is cake eating then I will broach that subject with him at some point.

Thanks once again everyone!