XW showing signs or just MLC script

[Irish M]

Merry Christmas to you all. Amazing people and just so many to name. Love you all like family.

I just got back from a quiet pre Christmas gathering at my parents. With my 3 brothers and all the kids and spouses, minus mine.

I'll be honest, this year I find it tougher than last. Last year I was still in a state of shell shock. Last year, I was trying to keep it as traditional as possible and start a few new traditions for us.

This year , even with all the %#&@ I got from my XW these last 2 months. I miss her.

I miss us coming home from my parents and relaxing before the Big Bang of excited kids on the morning of the 25th.


It was our time to recharge. To be together and enjoy Christmas. To get excited about the kids opening their presents.
I'd make her her coffee and sit in front of the fireplace and just enjoy that time together.

She's not here, I still want to make her the coffee. So I did. Put it on the table and said a prayer for her.

I'll be ok. Christmas is so exciting and busy this is all but a cycle of emotions that I will feel and then let go

Merry Christmas again.

Irish