When you will look for a lawyer, take your time and don't hesitate to ask some divorced women who were their lawyers and how satisfied they were with. Look for a very experienced one, there are so many situations that can arise, experience is the key, you don't want to lose money or time on extra paperwork that are not needed but make sure your position is well represented. The more a lawyer is despised by an ex-husband the better he was for his ex-wife. Usually a retainer fee is around $ 5.000 you can take the money from your main account, don't be shy or borrow money from a credit federal union connected through your employer (your husband won't know), their rates are extremely low for physicians.
Make an appointment with your personal physician and ask if some anti depressants and sleep aids might help, they helped me a lot, I didn't want to take any for about one year (I was also in the medical field before staying at home and raising my children and I thought I could deal without) even after one of my friends (another divorced doctor's wife) suggested it to me, they were life savers. She was so right, it helped me tremendously. I am now off from them, but sure they helped me to go through the second OW, the college visits and regain control of my mind. Take care of your health, you are now the only responsible parent. Everything will be fine, it is a process, remember step by step, accept help from friends and detach. Take a few days off if needed, your health is your children future.
Don't get fooled by him being nice today, my husband used to do that when he knew he went too far (flowers, gifts, jewelry, emptying the dishwasher..), respect and help should be daily not only after a fight to make up to feel good for the offender. He didn't care about his child happiness for her birthday it says a lot about his own selfishness. Mine was not here for his youngest one's birthday this year. His schedule was too busy, he makes his own schedule... Their priorities are themselves.
Me 52+ WH 57+ Married 20 + Piecing since 2016 (ready to give up...)
