I too share your consuming anger yet desire for spouses validation, so will be reading on about some good points deckard is bringing up.
Just brainstorming here...I feel very wronged and traumatized by the way in which ex left me. Being villified was really really damaging to me. I think because the lack of rational discussion left me feeling powerless. (Someone insisting that something white is actually blac). You were issued an order of protection. That's the ultimate vilification.
Is this anger and mixed feelings a form of some sort of post traumatic stress? I'm quite curious too.
P.S. I'm glad your finding happiness with gf. And I hope you come to terms with your feeling regarding ex wife.
