Phoebe, nearly a year on, still a work in progress

[Phoebe]

Hi, Painter!!! It is so lovely to hear from you. Thank you for checking in on me.

It is definitely a much different holiday season, but also, thankfully, one with much less drama and pain. I've been slowly figuring out what my new life might be like, and that is strange, yet also comforting. I'm creating new traditions and memories, spending time with new people. It's strange because it is so new, but comforting because it shows that life really does go on.

This year I have been slowly remembering that my happiness in the past wasn't simply a result of being married to H, therefore my happiness does not require his being in my life now.

Here's something encouraging: Monday night would have been my 21st anniversary, and it was also the day I realized my WH had truly run away from home, and wasn't just staying in a hotel overnight. I was worried that I would have a tough time if it, so I set up company and activities for the whole day, from waking to bedtime, and I had an unequivocally great day! I spent it with people who care about me, doing a bunch of fun things, from making a birthday cake for my dad to spending hours making Thai curry paste and then dinner using that very Thai curry. I just had fun.

More later. I'm a tired critter.

(((((Painter)))))

Hi to SH. I still plan on keeping up a journal here. It helps me straighten out my thoughts.