Infidelity/WAH, my story pt 7

[SH_]

Sara,
Many here love and respect you and want to help you...
Please listen with an open mind and heart.
There are many that can share thoughts, advice, tips and ideas that you can benefit from...

In order for that to happen, you will need to sit back and start with a beginners mindset.
You will have to go against all that "feels" right in what you do.
You have applied DB principles like a champ...perhaps the focus has been much on the principles and techniques that were not for your sitch...

LRT has been the principle for you sitch from the moment you arrived here...

Please sit and take note of the many that have traveled the road before you.
The many that have travelled the road with you and move forward successfully...
You can not follow a step by step process at this point...
You must follow the principles and apply what works...

Your question is how to go NC...and you follow with all of the reasons you cannot...
Perhaps look too the reasons and approaches that you can.

MWD just sent out an email that was titled "Practice what you preach"...
She says "Knowing what causes solutions is a great deal more helpful than knowing what causes problems."
"That's because, "What you focus on, expands." Now, just remember that, [Sara]."

You recently mentioned to me too not focus on the thoughts and ideas of others...make it my own...I want to encourage you of the opposite...
You are in the role of student now...you are a beginner...you must first learn the principles from others...then the potential approaches for applicability...then make it yours...
Doing it out of order will set you up to delay the struggle if not lead to a place that one does not want to g...
You will have to open your mind too the possibilities of the good that can come from it all, if you can apply the principles i order and effectively...

I wish that I could just pull you out of the pain, but I know and believe as a dear neighbor of ours, recently told me..."The only way is through it"...

You can do this...start with looking yourself in the eyes and accepting you for who you are...and accepting the BS that you are feeding yourself... then start the process of learning what you must and taking actions contra to your natural habits.
You will prevail...you have an army of us here to provide a helping hand of support, comfort and cheerleading...you will need to do the work, but we are here.

((((((((((Sara))))))))))