Lex, making money from art is difficult so I can respect the $900 income.
But look at the big picture, the very big picture. Is she living like a mature, independent adult? Is she an equally responsible, mature partner in your relationship? Does she work as hard and take on as much responsibility as you to run your household?
It's not about fairness -- hardly. It's about her being an empowered, mature adult.
Me: 50, MLC/WW 45 Young kids Nov 2015: BD1 Apr 2016: BD2 Jan 2017: W filed Feb 2017: D final
Do you feel more motivation to train judo? Have you thought about setting goals like for competition? I know it's rough on the body and not an old man's game. It's great that your son is doing it. You might look into taking up the "sister sport" as another gal activity.
- m and ww in 30s - s4 - m 11 yrs, t12 -ilybinilwy ~5/16 + request for OM - bd 7/16, confirm ea and strongly suspected pa - 9/16 ww claimed to have broken contact with om
What kind of art pieces does she make for fantasy dude?
mostly she is making him promotional stuff for his facebook page. But she is occasionally making him romantic stuff that is for him only. can't get more elaborate than that or it might identify him.
Do you feel more motivation to train judo? Have you thought about setting goals like for competition? I know it's rough on the body and not an old man's game. It's great that your son is doing it. You might look into taking up the "sister sport" as another gal activity.
I used to train 3 days a week but our club closed and this new one is further away. I am into it. I have competed in a few local tournaments over the last year. I did not place but I was still proud of my performance. Currently my goal is to get good enough to win some tournament matches.
My son on the other hand, he came in first in his division in the last tournament. He is getting pretty good. He's going to clobber me one day when he grows big enough LOL!
But look at the big picture, the very big picture. Is she living like a mature, independent adult? Is she an equally responsible, mature partner in your relationship? Does she work as hard and take on as much responsibility as you to run your household?
I'm not sure how to answer this. She definitely works hard.
In her own eyes she is apparently not a fully mature partner. She is the one making all the changes to try to achieve financial independence.
Fairness means nothing to me. I just want a wife who desires me.
Working hard is not the same as mature. My children work hard building things with blocks, and on school projects.
Working hard is necessary but not sufficient. Lots of unhealthy adults work incredibly hard on completely the wrong things. It's about having some wisdom about running a balanced, empowered, healthy life. It's about having some individual identity and power.
Originally Posted By: Lex23
In her own eyes she is apparently not a fully mature partner.
... because you do everything for her, like she's your child. She wants to feel empowered, independent.
Originally Posted By: Lex23
Fairness means nothing to me. I just want a wife who desires me.
I agree that it's not good to focus too much on fairness. But if you just want a wife who desires you, no matter how unhealthy she is, and how unhealthy the relationship ... well, you're experiencing the result of that kind of a dynamic.
I'm going through the same thing Lex, and I do have the tendency to take care of everything for my W, and I had no problem doing that. Now I wish I had done things differently from day one of our relationship.
Me: 50, MLC/WW 45 Young kids Nov 2015: BD1 Apr 2016: BD2 Jan 2017: W filed Feb 2017: D final
Do you feel more motivation to train judo? Have you thought about setting goals like for competition? I know it's rough on the body and not an old man's game. It's great that your son is doing it. You might look into taking up the "sister sport" as another gal activity.
I used to train 3 days a week but our club closed and this new one is further away. I am into it. I have competed in a few local tournaments over the last year. I did not place but I was still proud of my performance. Currently my goal is to get good enough to win some tournament matches.
My son on the other hand, he came in first in his division in the last tournament. He is getting pretty good. He's going to clobber me one day when he grows big enough LOL!
Awesome goal and awesome that your son is doing judo and doing well. It's a great thing to be able to work on together.
- m and ww in 30s - s4 - m 11 yrs, t12 -ilybinilwy ~5/16 + request for OM - bd 7/16, confirm ea and strongly suspected pa - 9/16 ww claimed to have broken contact with om
we had a great weekend together. Probably going to have an even better weekend this coming weekend as we go to an indoor water park for xmas. She is still turning away from my kisses but is initiating heavy petting and cuddling with me at night. I always figured that no kissing is a powerful sign from a woman that she is not really interested in you but maybe I think to much. she has not messaged celeb all week. His responses have slowed down ever since W sent him a particularly suggestive email a few weeks ago. I know she is worried because she has asked me to make sure her email is working correctly a few times (it is working)
bottom line is that I still have no idea if we are coming together or not. I am still planning on outing her celeb emails in the first week of January. I have no idea if this is a mistake or not but I don't want to ruin the holiday plans so I am waiting.
is it bad for me to try to initiate cuddling/petting (no sex) at a time like this? That is what I want to do but not sure if it would hurt or help.
W had some good events related to her art business and that has elevated her mood. She still wants to achieve financial independence which I consider a great goal and I am still helping her when I can.
kids are happy and excited about this weekend. they have no idea there is trouble.
Is it wise to contact the OM in a situation like mine. I had not really considered it before because he is not really feeding into it. I felt like he was just a symptom and not the problem. I kind of admire him for remaining friendly without encouraging her flirting. He has been divorced before so perhaps he doesn't want to create a situation like that. He must know the pain of it all. Anyhow, it seems like there is a decent chance that he would comply with my request and tell her they are just friends. Is this a bad idea?
