You know what, G, sometimes we are just sad. And I don't think we always necessarily have to freakin name it and identify it and all that. Sometimes we just are and it's ok.

You want something in your life that you are missing. You had it for awhile and it felt good and you want it again. Aint nothing wrong with that.

And I am all for looking inward and figuring out what we feel. But sometimes I just feel down because life gets to be alot. I feel down because my son is struggling, I am a mess financially, my health isnt great and that I have very little family.

None of that shows a lacking in me. I give myself permission to feel that way because I can. smile As long as I don't live there.

This is a hard time of year for you. Hard for me for a lot of reasons. I had myself a good cry today. Wish I could say it shook all the sadness, but, it didnt.

I also know I will feel good again. That's the thing about life, right? All these moments are always changing. Nothing stays the same.

And I agree, I think positivity attracts positivity. But sometimes, you get a priest who wants to tongue kiss or a plumber who...whatever he wanted. Absolutely no reflection on you. They are who they are. You stumbled upon them.

I also think that most of us are broken in some way or another. I think when we get put back together, the cracks are stronger somehow, but, the scars, while they fade, they still exist some.

I am so happy to read that you like you. I am happy you have your girl and friends and your dad. I wish that you had someone who can appreciate you for the amazing woman you are because I know how much you want that. I also know you will one day. I know it without a single doubt. When it is supposed to happen. When it is the right time. When you are really and truly ready and your life is.

I wish I could take the sad away for you. But, I know you also experience great joy.

You are so hard on yourself. I feel like you feel that it isnt ok to feel the way you do. And all feelings are valid. It's the actions on those feelings that matter.

I was thinking today that it is time for me to make another change. It's the only way that things move. It could be a little one, though, for me, it may have to be a bit bigger.

You are on a new path with school. I am thinking that will lead you somewhere different.

Keep going, G. Keep moving forward. There is a shift coming for you. I can feel it. Be open to the possibilities. Til then....keep being you. <3