That's me in the spotlight

[Altair]

Hi Coly,
Ha! Not sure my parties I attend are anything to live vicarously through, but maybe! You're going to love my latest GAL-- I've accepted a request to cat sit and.... CHICKEN SIT!
It so happens a co-worker has chickens! In this big ole city! They live really close to me- 2ish miles. I, of course, did not want to accept this duty next week while they holiday and I... sit at their house alone with a cat and chickens. But I said yes! why not? I do miss owning a home, for sure. This will be a nice change of habitat.

Yes, I believe something has shifted inside of me. I think it has been a huge plus my GAL has nothing to do with H-- actually with NC it is best that way, for sure, but extra hard for the homebody. (GAL homebody at.. other people's home? lol)

Let's see, where am I at this second in my thinking. Well, disappearing from a marriage isn't "normal". It's gotten to the point for me where, it's just... beyond. (I know, hello MLC/depression). It's so irrational at this point I find it hard to even consider H reasons for leaving at this point-- they don't make sense, don't connect to anything, etc... Blaming me for having to run away, it just doesn't add up at this point. Meaning, I gave him lots of outs. But no, he didn't want a D, just to run away from his life. We had a nice life, I'm sure of it. I'll probably try to set up a similar one on my own, slowly as I can. We know the worst of this is the limbo. But, he's gone! That isn't limbo! I have in a pen and paper journal from June a little jot that says "NC for maybe 6 mnths". I don't remember if he said that or I thought it or something-- but it is there. Meaning this could go 6 months or longer. I still don't want to think about filing. Make him do the work...