To speak to happiness, My thoughts have changed often on that subject, heavily discussed with my therapist. DB teaches happiness comes from within. Which I believe is true to a point. I believe we are responsible for seeking our own happiness. No other person can provide what makes us happy. However, when there is something that is a part of who you are that makes you happy and you are missing it, then it's something you need. A part of my soul and my inner core is human connection. Connecting with a partner on a deep and loving level. It's a part of my soul and who I am. So when that's missing, it makes me sad, but doesn't necessarily take away my happiness. If that makes sense. This is what my therapist deducted and I think she was spot on.
I love what you wrote here! Relationship is the human condition. This is one of the reasons I am a Christian...if you believe the Bible, God created us because He wanted relationship. Wow, that means the creator of all things needs and wants a relationship with each one of us. That's powerful!If He needs it then why wouldn't I? There are many ways of obtaining relationship and a one to one with a partner in life is one most of us are drawn to. Your desires are human and worthy...and I think patience is key. Yes, we are responsible for our own happiness but there are many winding roads to follow in getting there. Now, re: the white picket fence idea. I remembered a story a chaplain at work once told me. In the church she previously pastored there was a couple that seemed to be the ultimate "white picket fence" couple. She said after church one day she saw them walking home hand in hand and thought is was so beautiful. Later that day she received a call and the husband had stabbed the wife to death. Things aren't always as they seem. Hang in there, enjoy the relationships that you have and smile because down the road, if you want it and put the work in, that which you seek will be yours
