Hanging and hoping- seperation edition

[BillyHo]

Saturday night W ended up staying the night at her girlfriends house after the Christmas party. I got a tm from the friend at 12:30 saying W was too "tired" to drive home. The friend lives 5 minutes away. The next morning I was up early again and did a little cleaning and laundry. Got a fm from the friend saying W forgot her phone at the party and would be home after she picked it up. I made breakfast for the boys gave S4 a bath and got everybody ready for church.

Went to church with the boys. I am very good at holding it together lately but being at church without W really gets to me. A song hit me just right and the tears started to well up in my eyes. My 2 oldest boys were in Sunday school class and S4 was asleep in my arms. One of my friends can over and put his arm around me for support. I am so lucky to have a lot of people supporting me (including W whole family) through this.

When we arrived home W was there and wanted to be chatty with me. I was short with my answers because I just didn't feel like faking the whole everything is cool thing. She asked if I was ok and if we needed to talk about anything. I said no I am fine. I watched football with the boys and she kind of hung around while we watched. Later a couple of our friends came to help her move some things. I am glad they did because I just wasn't in a state of mind that I wanted to help.

W came home later and we sat down and played some board games with the boys. I am glad to say that since we told the boys she is leaving W has been very good with the boys. She has always been a great mom but over the last 7 months has been in and out as far as giving them attention. I hope she continues to be so good with them. If nothing else at least the boys will be getting the attention they deserve.