W had A and broke it off soon as I confronted her

[Steady9]

Over the past few years, I have encouraged her to go back to school (she has a BS already) I have encouraged her to try different types of jobs, full or part time.... We spend time together from camping to disney.... And I am up for anything...

I take the boredom seriously today.... although I did not know she was bored before...She did not say she was bored until she was explaining....what happened.

Today I am spicing things up from the bedroom to going out with just the two of us... But also she has made this easy because she is up for trying new things and also is glad I gave this another chance...

Maybe Rose--as a female-- you can comment. How does boredom lead to this??? Evidently she was just FB texting a new friend ( A guy from 8th grade...who she had not seen since then) and then she was heading back to home town in June--so for the 6 months leading up to that, she must have gotten more and more in to the texting...

And then while visiting, decided to have the PA--assuming I would never find out...

For me, I cannot truly understand... I assume I can get to forgiveness... but I would never do this type of stuff ( I don't think) I have had a few women hit on me over the years, but I just walk away and not put myself in to a situation ....

So I do not understand how my W let it go this far... not sure if it matters either... today I mostly feel like she is not the person I thought I knew... in terms of integrity or deep love or something. So right now I just go through the motions and hope the feeling of love comes back...an adult love... Today, I just try to take care of her like a family member or if it was my daughter and she did something stupid... I would still take care of her....

I think my W can tell I am using this mechanism to keep going. And I think she is ok with it for now. She just wants to stay married to me. She has turned up the sex in the bedroom and the service and niceness outside the bedroom as well.

Oh and meant to mention... I think service is her main love style...And I think she was enjoying helping this OM with post divorce issues.... and she likes to help...

OK thanks Rose for the note and any thoughts appreciated.