Your attorney's have basically said that once you go there you are risking her filing a motion and messing with custody. It's only a matter of time before she actually gets a little rational and talks honestly with her own attorney who will absolutely tell her to agree to anything, just get you move there and THEN he or she will be sure to take you on then.
There is no way you can get her to waive her right to file a future motion in Ontario. Where there is a will, there is a way for a well-paid attorney to find a foothold upon which to state an adequate enough claim to force you back to the bargaining table. It doesn't have to be a winning argument. It doesn't have to be true (though it's supposed to be).
You've done a marvelous job demonstrating you are the safest most concern and cooperative "co-parent" and despite the counselors want to have the two of you in the same city - it's impossible despite your willingness.
Stay in Michigan. Normalize the situation and solidify your position as PRIMARY parent such that someday, in a year or more, she'll be begging you to move there and willing to agree to anything (which you shouldn't offer 50-50, but just 1/3, at most).
It won't be as risky in a year either. Sure she could bring a motion then too -- but after a year plus of consistent parenting pretty much solely by you, she won't have much of a leg to stand on.
I KNOW taking care of 5 boys alone wasn't what you signed up for when you and she adopted those boys years ago, but God won't give you more than you can handle. Focus your energies on getting help from family and friends and approach this situation as though your ex-wife has died (because she's really as good as dead to you and those boys right now).
The internet is 90% complaining and entitlement and I hate it because I deserve better!
