Am I in withdrawal ... will he ever wake up

[Lana_71]

Hello ..... so after his last touch I didnot send anything ... yesterday my youngest replied to his loving them msg say ok cool ... she made me laugh but I said nothing ... my eldest didnot reply... so We wake up today with a new good morning txt msg also addressed to kids with a picture of the fog in his city ...
well ... don't know if it is right or not but I sent him privately the msg I earlier sent to his disconnected phone ... that good morning and we plan to travel and is is welcomed to join ....
No replies yet.. I am ok whether he replies or not ...I felt I want to do that and it is up to him how to respond ... I feel I am not afraid anymore of whatever happens ...I have been reading detachment thread lately and I think I detached my self of the outcome and results... I am not as emotional as before and after last episode I guess I stopped worrying about wether he is doing well or not . Actually weird enough I got disturbed when I thought I have to answer him back for his last txt and felt uneasy ....happy I didnot .... maybe I am more at ease lately without him .....ummmm what does that say....... I am lately looking and applying for jobs.... I have a part time position and feel things will turn just fine....
I saw lately the Ted talk of Shawn anchor ... I really recommend everyone to see it .... I realized that I am doing a lot of the items he suggested like mediation, 3 gratitude, journally positive, no multi tasking, trying to be in the moment or present and not to worry about tomorrow... yes I would love my marriage to be restored and I know he is a good man but maybe there is wisdom for me to have to go through this ordeal .... and maybe this is better than something else.... anyway since I don't have control over this I just need to work with it... thank you for letting me vent here ... it is good therapy to write down positive feelings ....
I hope anyone reading this have a great day ahead....