From me, I think the main messages would be self care and independence. Try not to look closely at your W and link your moods to hers at all. I know that must be really hard, but try to release that completely, because she probably just doesn't have that to offer right now.
This advice from Sotto is golden, and I could not agree more. For every time I felt pain and/or despair, I've seen my wife going through much worse. It's true, they just don't have it in them to offer right now.
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And finally, please don't feel trapped in a situation that you are unhappy with in the longer term. I'm never going to encourage someone to give up on their M and that's not what I'm saying. I'm only reminding you that there are two of you in this marriage and you each have an equal vote. Only you know whether and for how long you will choose to remain in the current situation and that is always up to you, and you have plenty of power to make personal choices within the constraints of the current circumstances.
Yep. Knowing that I always had that "get out of M" card in my back pocket to play at any time has actually given me hope and helped me to carry on.
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
in my back pocket to play at any time has actually given me hope and helped me to carry on.