First off, I am glad to have found this forum. My wife and I have been married for 9 years. I am 35 and she is 34 now. We have 2 boys ages 1 and 8. We started dating when she was just a teenager and I was 20. I was still a little wild, going out and drinking and stuff. I have a one night stand while we were dating and never told her about it. I lied about it because I did not want to hurt her and wanted to marry my wife. Some years after we were married, after our first child, I came clean. she cornered me about it and I admitted it. it was damaging for her. She suffered postpartum depression after my first child and get better. We then had a second child, planned. She suffered PPD again after our 2nd child but this time was way worse. She was hospitalized and new medications were prescribed for depression and anxiety. just 8 months later, she was going out, being social and met 2 guys at a bar. She exchanged numbers with one of them and they began to have inappropriate conversations. No clue if it ever progressed, but I was clueless until I stumbled across these unknown numbers in our cell bill. When I confronted her I thought things we ok, until she got very mad. she said I was not giving her privacy. She began talking to another guy from the bar via text who is 10 years younger than her and single. I began doing bad things, like checking her phone for messages, email, and facebook. She was messaging him on facebook and other ways. she said they were just friends. I dont believe in having friends that are that new of the opposite sex. While I do not know for sure if she has been unfaithful, I do know we have not had sex since before I approached her about the guys. I admit, I have been a bit angry and upset and may have said some things that were hurtful, but i had no clue my wife was talking to these people. She has been on antidepressants and anxiety meds. Celexa, Wellbutrin, and at one time seraquel. We had a good few weeks last month but that was ruined by me seeing texts on her phone by the second guy, telling her if she was stressed out to "Rub one out". I flipped out. Nobody should talk to my wife like that. So those few good weeks were ruined. So now, she is trying to wean herself off of meds under dr's supervision. She has told me recently she didnt think she could ever be physical with me or trust me. I told her if that was the case she needed to leave me, and I walked away from her just to give myself space. She texted me back and asked that i be patient and let her wean herself off the meds and she didnt feel herself. I have told her I am all about forgiveness, but that doesnt make anything wash away. I love her dearly, but will not compete for my wifes attention or affection. I will not do separation or divorce and return to marriage with her. If it cant be worked out now while I am eager I dont want to put myself through all these emotions again.
Anyone else experience wives on medications acting out? We had a pretty good marriage before or i thought we did. She has gone as far as to tell me at times she faked it and then came back to say she didnt. She told me she lost feelings for me when she got out the hospital a year ago. She has very little emotions but shows anger. She said she has no feeling for me or anything really. we have done individual counselling along with couples counselling.
