she did say to me one time about a month ago that I think she is not good enough. I assured her that I never thought that. it's not re-occurring though.
Why would she bring this up again? She said that she had a feeling of something, and your response was to shut it down. Instead of looking at how she might feel that way, your response was to basically say that she was wrong. You dont think that by commandeering all of the responsibilities of the household, it can make someone feel useless or inferior?
Originally Posted By: Lex23
she has also said that I am controlling her when I talk about our relation ship. this is not completely unfair as I am a fairly persuasive guy.
Similar comments as above. She comes to you to discuss something, and your approach is to convince her that she isnt correct. Its not about being 'persuasive' - maybe you should read up on validation and try practicing that type of communication.
Originally Posted By: Lex23
she also told me that our wedding ring was a "slave" ring when I asked her to wear it again back in September. so I let it go and stopped wearing mine to show that there was no slavery.
Why did you take your ring off? Because she did? To convince her of something? Im guessing that didnt work. In my mind, my ring was a personal commitment to my ex. I took it off when I was finished with the marriage. I dont think playing games with that is a great idea.
Originally Posted By: Lex23
she spends her home time making art. she is pretty productive but does not make much money. she is serious about it and trying to make money though. it is high quality stuff and generally well received when people see it.
So you go to work while shes working on her art? Then why is it your responsibility to come home and do all of the chores just because she was home all day?
Originally Posted By: Lex23
I cannot live this way. I worry some every day even though I try to practice mindfulness and thankfulness. I am very sad. I am embarresed to admit this even on an anonymous forum but last week I looked at the "casual hookups" section of craigslist and fantasized about hooking up with some of the women who had posted there. My fantasy got a little to real and I felt I could actually see myself going though with this. I felt bad about that and have not looked again.
So if you cant live like this, why are you so reluctant to change?
